God's Not Awkward

This weekend God spoke to me clearer than ever before. Like, out LOUD. I was in the shower, which makes it kinda weird, but I feel like thats okay because--you know--it's God.

Drama Queen

"Like, my Schubert stuff is SOOO beautiful, and my professor gives me folk music? Like...seriously? It's like "toodle-dee toodlle-dee." Like...are you serious?"

Gaming

During a conversation about video game lingo:

"I don't like RL (sic) [real life]. There's too much spawn camping."

Oh, men.

spoken by a female in the Stupe, in much agitation:

"How am I supposed to know how he's feeling?! He never talks about his feelings! It's ridiculous!!"

Dorm life

Tonight one of my female roommates said, "I can't imagine ever having a guy roommate." To which my other roommate responded: "That's called being married."

In Fischer, just before the pillow fight on the quad

"Dude, no, this is a $60 pillow I got for Christmas!"

Whoops

At Chapel the other day we were singing a song with something about being "far apart," but I accidently sang it "fart." I was like, "Sorry, Lord!" and hoped no one heard me.

Merely a suggestion.

Heard at the ring-by-spring table:

A girl to her friends: "You're filling out this survey. I want nieces and nephews."

Preying on the Freshmen?

Guy: Hey umm. . . could I . . err. . possibly borrow Twilight?

Girl: Sure thing!

Guy: It's just for our floor. . . no, I mean, like for our sister floor. . .

Girl: Wait a minute!! Are you trying to hit on freshmen?

It would be a good idea to learn about Nate and Jim.

"I really like the St. Elliot apartments, but when I tell my friends from high school where I live it makes it sound like I go to some Pape school."

This is unfortunate.

"I would take communion, but I just can't stand grape juice."

Be in good taste, friends.

Wilhelmina has scruples. Guest submitters, let's agree to keep this blog out of the gutter.

Coed Study Session

Co-ed study sessions are always productive.

Guy 1: Dude, where have you been all evening. The lib?
Guy 2: Yeah, I was studying.
Guy 1: With WHO?
Guy 2: [Short list of names, all female]
Guy 1: Uh-huh, I'll BET you were studying!
Guy 2: No, I was studying!
Guy1: Sure you were...studying someONE.

Different Types of Students

P1: Dude, are you actually reading that?

P2: What, this? Plato's Republic? Yep.

P1: Uggh, horrible book. You should really just give up and read the SparkNotes. Thats what I did and it had everything.

P2: I'm pretty sure you can't read the SparkNotes for a Talbot class.

P1: Its the way to go.

Later--

P1: Dude, good luck with that. I hated that book. Worst book I have EVER read...ever.

Two years ago at Buswell

I wouldn't believe it if I wasn't there myself. This takes place at
the labbie desk where the stapler is labeled "please return to the
color printer."

Girl: Oh... Do you have another stapler? My paper is black and white, not color.
Her Friend (unfazed): Oh, it's okay, sweetie, go ahead.

A mere technicality

Football Player 1: what UP.

Football Player 2: Dude, I said hey to you earlier.

Football Player 1: No, you just gave me The Look.

But are they Verizon or Sprint?

Overheard in line at SAGA:

"Yeah, I'd like the beans, and the beef, and the cellphone noodles-- wait-- I mean-- the cellophane noodles."

Two Professors

Awkwardness isn't confined to students.

[Pause]
"So....did you survive the weekend?"
"Survive? Umm...well...survive? Yes."

Said to Ari Hyde:

"So Messianic Jews kinda believe in Jesus, right?"

Oh, fun!

"Well, this has been fun and all, but let's go to the library."

One word: Nerd.

"Gosh, that is the best class! I love Organic Chemistry!"

Thanks to Sunday School

"I don't mind like helping people, cus I know like that's what Christians are supposed to do."

Only at Wheaton

"So what are your majors?"

I could swear, I'm an atypical student at Wheaton because I only have one major, I'm not graduating early, and I didn't come in with sophomore or junior standing in credit hours.